Facebook
Twitter
Instagram
YouTube
iTunes
Spotify
Bandsintown
vk

HELLO YOU.

I SOMEHOW FEEL IT IS MY SPIRITUAL DUTY TO YOU, MY VIRTUAL-COSY -FANTASY-FRIENDS, TO EXPLAIN WHERE I AM. PERHAPS IN THE HOPE OF RECONNECTING AND MOTIVATING MYSELF IN A TIME OF INCREASING VULNERABILITY. A VAGUE ATTEMPT TO OPEN  UP ONCE MORE, WHEN I SENSE THE OLD PATTERNS AND NEUROSES CREEPING BACK IN. TO USE YOU AS MY PSYCHOTHERAPY GUINEA PIGS,  IN THE SWEETEST AND MOST SYMBIOTIC WAY OF COURSE.

PLEASE DON’T FEEL ABUSED. IF I WERE TO MEET YOU AND WE TO DISCOVER EACH OTHER,  I WOULD SHOW YOU I AM ALSO A GOOD LISTENER.

HAVING NO REAL PURPOSE TO THIS WRITING RAMBLE ABOUT TO COME, I WOULD LIKE TO  THANK YOU, AGAIN, YOU MY TRIBE, FROM THE BOTTOM OF MY HYPERSENSITIVE HEART, FOR BEING OUT THERE WITH WIDE EYES, LIBERAL MINDS AND CHEEKY SMILES.

AS WE HAVE DISCUSSED, IT IS CLEAR TO US THAT THE WORLD IS HILARIOUSLY FUCKED.

DISTORTED VILE RELIGIONS, ENSLAVING POLITICS, CRIPPLING BANKS AND THE MEDIA LIES. DRUGS FILL SMALL HOLES ONLY TO CREATE CRATERS, SEX DELIVERS, OH SO TRANSIENTLY. CONTENTMENT AND LOVE SLIP AND WRIGGLE IN AND OUT OF OUR GRASP DAY IN, DAY OUT.  WE ARE SO REPETITIVELY POISONED AND NUMBED IT HAS BECOME A STATE OF COMFORT AND NEED. THE MCDONALDS, THE SHOPPING, THE TV, THE SCHOOLING.

WE KNOW THIS. BUT DESPITE IT, WE CAN BE HAPPY. WE CAN WEEN OURSELVES OFF. WE CAN REVEL IN THE FIGHT AND THE JOURNEY. WE CAN TURN THE BAD BLOOD INTO GOOD. WE CAN ROLL AROUND IN THE MUCK OF OUR  POINTLESS EVERYDAYNESS AS LONG AS WE  REMEMBER BEAUTY AND TRUTH IS OUT THERE AND ACKNOWLEDGE REASON AND INDEPENDENT THOUGHT.

IT IS DESPERATELY IMPORTANT TO HAVE VIVID REASON IN THE FACE OF INSANITY. MUSIC IS SCIENCE AND EMOTION. SCIENCE AND EMOTION ARE GODS. THAT IS ALL.

(IF YOU WANT SOME INSPIRING MIND INPUT WATCH THIS MAN.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jacob_Bronowski

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=87v118RSb2Q&feature=related)

SOMEONE CONVINCED ME LATELY TO REVEL IN THE NATURAL REAL ME . TO BE PROUD OF THAT AWKWARD BOY. REWARD HIM AND BE BRAZEN AND EXTROVERT. IRONICALLY, I HAVE BEEN BEING HIM IN MY MUSIC FOR AS LONG AS I REMEMBER, BUT SELDOM HAVE I FELT PRIVATELY COMFORTABLE. WHEN YOU LIVE AS THE PERSON YOU THINK YOU SHOULD HAVE ALWAYS BEEN IT IS CONFUSING.

ON MANY LEVELS AM I CONFUSED. INCLUDING SOCIALISING. APPARENTLY I HAVE SOCIAL ANXIETY. MAKES SENSE I GUESS.

BEING AND WORKING WITH PEOPLE IS ALWAYS TURBULENT. TO BE NICE, TO BE FIRM, TO BE REWARDED, TO BE FAIR. I HAVE FOUND MYSELF UTTERLY FRUSTRATED BY MY DESIRE TO PLEASE AND TO BE LOVED. YOU CANNOT CHANGE OR CONTROL PEOPLE FROM THE CORE. THEY WILL ALWAYS HAVE THEIR OWN OPINIONS AND PERCEPTION OF WHO YOU ARE. THEY WILL HURT YOU AND THEY WILL LOVE YOU ON THEIR TERMS, NOT YOURS. WHEN YOU GIVE TOO MUCH THEY TAKE MORE, WHEN YOU TAKE TOO MUCH THEY GIVE YOU THE GUILT.

EXAGGERATE THE COLOURFUL RIDICULOUS ECCENTRIC SELF. THE CROSS DRESSING, AGGRESSIVE, EMOTIONAL, GENTLE, HUNGRY ANIMAL. STAY WITH YOURSELF AND GIVE THEM LESS TO PREJUDGE.

OH DEAR, THIS SELF HELP SESSION NEEDS TO END HERE.

WE RECENTLY SHOT A VIDEO FOR THE SONG MY SECRET FRIEND, WITH THE AMAZING IMOGEN HEAP IN BERLIN. I DIRECTED IT. I FELT LIKE A LITTLE INDIE ED WOOD RUNNING AROUND IN A DRESS TELLING PEOPLE WHAT TO DO AND BEING UTTERLY AT ONE WITH MYSELF. THERE WAS LAUGHTER AND ARGUMENT AND ART. A LITTLE TOO MUCH LIFE TO HOLD ON TO FOR ONE DAY, BUT THAT IS OK. SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO LET THINGS GO AND BE BRAVE THAT MORE EXCITING THINGS WILL COME. NOSTALGIA IS AN IDIOTIC WASTE OF TIME.

I WAS AND STILL AM COMPLETELY WOUND UP AND DEEPLY STRESSED ABOUT IT ALL, BUT IT IS NOW EDITED AND FINISHED AND I HAVE TO MOVE ONTO A REMIX OF THE TRACK SO BACK TO SOUND FOR A FEW DAYS.

WE MUST GO WITH THE NONSENSE. THE BUZZING FEELING OF PENDING HEART ATTACK AND UNPREDICTABLE FUTURE. BEING HUMAN IS LIKE QUANTUM PHYSICS. EVERYTHING IS UNCERTAIN, APPROXIMATE AND CHANGING. WE MUST TRUST OUR GUT TO SURVIVE.

TODAY THREE KISSES.

XXX

Recent Posts

Leave a Comment

0